...that Slender(MILD) sound

Testimony

Indian Evangelical Lutheran church. This is my spiritual beginning. This church only (Lutheran) taught me in my childhood days “who is Jesus to me”. Moreover the same church imparted sound education which enlightened my knowledge in the diverse field. But in the course of time I started to view the worship and the meeting convened by the church were empty and hallow- not applicable to the practical way of living. The habit of bible reading and prayer did not find a place my youth hood. While I was studying VIII standard my schoolmate cum friend placed a book in my hand. That book was penned by an atheist and a renowned scholar from TamilNadu. After the perusal of the book a transformation was affected in my thinking. The seed – there is no God – is deeply implanted in my soul.

During my college period the thrust for atheism got fully accelerated. I developed a passion for books in which contrary and conflicting opinion about Jesus Christ were exemplified. On hearing about my reading books of this nature the Librarian of the college put a ban in lending books to me but I turned to the public library to get the books which dwelt in length about atheism. I got attracted towards the books which centred on the Gods of fictitious nature. I was an atheist to the core. And I became a powerful instrument to speak against Christianity. I enrolled myself as a member of one particular party and I made use of every platform given to me to speak on atheism in detail with a view to meeting the requirement of the political party. Being a graduate I received good reception and encouragement from every quarter. My family was greatly troubled and upset over my style of functioning – doing no work but applying heart and soul into politics. I used to return home late night around 02.00am in the morning. As usual one night I was walking along with my friends through a thickly wooded forest to reach a village. I was on an important mission, to conduct a self respect marriage. At that time in the thick of the night I heard a sound in my heart STOP. I heeded the voice and stood still, my friends also followed my stand. To take stock of the situation I lighted a match and I was surprised beyond words to find a dilapidated well right in front of me (on my return journey I came to know about the well in detail and death was eminent if I would have fall into it). Who is the one who stopped me in the run against God? I was not able to comprehend it at all. Only during the later days wisdom did dawn upon me to realize that it was the voice of Jesus who came in search of me despite my belligerent attitude (I never searched for God). Yet I did not deviate from the pursuit of atheism. In every stage I trumpeted that there was no God, no God at all to be found. In my discourses on the stage, Jesus and Bible had become the butt of my ridicule. In fact I became a rebellious, unbending dishonest youth.

My mother said to me “Son, you have become an atheist to deny the very existence of God. When you were a child, you were at the brink of death about to die at any time. At that time I made a covenant with my Lord stating that I will give my son to the Lord for His work if he would recover from his illness. But now you have change for the worse.” I could see the deep anguish in the heart of my mother but I was unmoved and firm in my stand. I persisted in my way of living – adhering to the ideas and principles enunciated in the new doctrine, ATHESIM. One night around 2 am as I was inching my way back home, I heard a sound “How long my son?” After reaching home I was eager to know the reason for the question so I asked my mother” why did you ask such a question”. But she replied in the negative. Only then did I realise that it was the voice of God. I was quite unaware of the compelling divine love which was in hot pursuit after me.

One day I had a bout of epileptic attack and I was rushed to the hospital in the critical condition. My visage became totally distorted. Not able to stand on my own I fell down frequently. Many reasons were attributed to my ailment but no way for the cure was suggested. Even the doctors were unable to diagnose the source of the disease. The fear of death started to grip me tightly. Again I heard the sound, “stir out from your bed” and go home. I discerned that it was the voice of God and I expressed my desire to my mother to move out of the hospital but she dint attach any importance to my saying. Then I made up my mind to go home against the wishes and warnings of the doctor who were attending on me. From that day onwards I was totally free from the disease. I do confess and proclaim that Jesus cured me of the illness which the doctors couldn’t do so. As the days rolled on I slipped back to the old ways of thinking, harping on the same issue “there is no God”. Despite the fact revealed in the scripture that only the fool says in his heart there is no God, I viewed myself as a wise person indulging in perverted thinking.

After the completion of BT course I became an English teacher in a high school. In the year 1966 (I was 28yrs old) I was selected as an English teacher for a school in the country of Ethiopia. I was waiting for my departure at the Delhi airport (on 7th September 1966). At that time I was accosted by a Pastor Sam Paul of CPM who shot a question at me. “Are you saved?” I lost my temper and retorted, it is not fair on your part to put a question like this to a passenger, waiting for boarding a flight, and that too during this midnight”. The pastor pleaded with me to spare 2 minutes for him but I turned a deaf ear to his request and started to move towards the check in counter. Though I was holding a confirmed ticket I was denied a seat, hence my journey was delayed by one week. I was given accommodation in a hotel in Delhi at the expense of the airline. As I was coming out of the airport to go the hotel, the pastor saw me again. I felt miserable, humble beyond measure and I sneaked out of the place. I had to stay for the whole week to take the next flight but the thought of having refused to give two minutes to the pastor tormented me. I understand the plain truth (God will never allow himself to be mocked at).

I was staying in a posh hotel and was ruminating on the prospect of making money in a foreign land. All of a sudden I heard a big sound like that of a thunder. Immediately I knelt down, after the sound of the thunder receded, I was able to hear a mild voice” For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world and lose his soul?”. (Mark 8: 36). These words made deep in roads in my heart and broke the same to pieces. I confessed all my sins to God. As I was kneeling down before His presence, a great peace descended into my heart (which I never felt in my lifetime) I heard that sound again advising me to get baptized and proceed on my journey. I went in search of the pastor, whom I met in the airport, but he was not to be found since he has moved to some other location. I returned to the hotel with a heavy heart. My revised journey was fixed on 14th September. To take baptism before my departure was running in my mind. As I was contemplating on these lines, the day 13th September dawned. I knew very well that I have to commence my journey day after (14 September). All of a sudden Pastor Sam Paul came to my room at 10pm on 13th sep. He explained the scriptures, prepared me for the baptism and took leave of me promising to come the next day.

On the appointed day 14th September, Pastor did come on time but I was experiencing an inner conflict in me- a great stumbling and tumbling raging in me. “Don’t take the baptism and don’t leave the principle you had followed hither to”. Immediately I changed my mind and made myself clear to him that I will not take the baptism. Again the pastor, like a father implored to me to accept Christ by way of taking baptism. I sternly refused his request and I was adamant in my stand. On my return from Ethiopia, I will take the baptism without fail, I replied to him thus. He retorted by asking a question. “I you die on the way, where will you spend your eternity?” I replied in the negative. Don’t threaten me by bringing the concept and reality of death? Pastor was slowly walking away from my presence with a heavy heart.

I started to hear the mild voice of the spirit of God “take baptism right now, if not you will not get the chance at all.” Not able to resist the prompting of the spirit I called the pastor again making my intention clear to him. I am ready to take the baptism. The pastor arranged for a cab and urged me to get into it. When I asked him what was the hurry he replied that that before I changed my mind I should be given baptism in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit – no time to be wasted. On the 14th September 1966 I was baptised at 10 am in the pond near the Palam airport by Pastor Sam Paul. As directed and guided by God my journey to Ethiopia commenced on that night (14th September).

Our flight got delayed in Karachi for more than 5 hours and we reached Addis Ababa very late, the capital of Ethiopia. I happened to overhear the conversation between the captain and the co-pilot and from them I came to know that though the flight was delayed for more than 5 hours God had used that delay to escape from a great danger. At once I recalled to my mind the pastor’s word, “Take Baptism today otherwise you will not get a chance again”. The circumstances and the atmosphere of the new country were diverse in nature and it took time for me to adjust to the new environment. On hearing my experience concerning the baptism all my colleagues made fun of me and I became a laughing stock among them. I was wondering, nay even thinking how this baptism was going to benefit me in the long run. Finally I took a decision to forget all about this baptism thinking that this is the best way to do at that period of time.

After closing the door, I retired to bed thinking that no one was aware of my baptism. Within a few seconds I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door to see them. I saw two Tamil Christian brothers Bro. Simon Stanley and Pastor David Paul both from Chennai. Both of them prayed for me fervently and advised to stand firmly on the new covenant (baptism) I have entered into. I was surprised beyond words and asked them how they came to know about my baptism. They replied that the pastor who gave the baptism to me met them at the airport and informed them about my double mindedness, my vacillating nature, or my unsteady mind and pressed upon the need to pray for me too. What concern did the Lord have for my salvation? Even the pastor was not lagging behind in his concern for my redemption. Praise the Lord.

Again I heard the slender voice on 07th February 1968. Keel down-resign your job, Go back to India render your service to me. I obeyed the command, resigned the job, came back to India to start my ministry. In the year 1962, on 07th February I was blessed with spirit anointment, enabling me to speak in tongues. My spiritual guide Pastor Sam Sundaram led me into this new experience. From that moment onwards, I saw a vast transformation coming over my ministry. As per His will and guidance I came to Vellore in the year 1980 (June 20th) Many were of the opinion that I would not stand for long in His service. Amidst problems and stiff resistance God enabled me to stand firm in the way, earmarked for me. The initial days, we were forced to encounter hunger, poverty and humiliation but we did make rapid progress in our spiritual journey. In the year 1981, on 2nd November we attached ourselves with the great Pentecostal movement called the Assembly of God and our church began to grow in all aspects. During those times, the only church that was established is the one, which now stands in Vellore - 6 (Arakkonam being the only exception). The church began to flourish amidst many problems like the opposition from different churches, hunger strike by disgruntled elements, false complaints from police department, pamphlets of mean nature criticising the activities of the church. God gave us the courage to stand against every odd situation. I lost my wife on 10th January 1991. But God strengthened and reinforced my faith to stand firm for him. Twenty eight years have rolled on by the grace of God. After completing 29 years in ministry, I do recall to my mind the day (September 14) of my salvation with gratitude. I am bound to express my thankfulness to my Redeemer (One Thousand times). The still, small and the slender voice is still lingering in my ears conveying the message in crystal terms “In your life time, none can prevail against you”.

“On Christ the solid, Rock, I stand All other ground is sinking sand”
These words of Martin Luther are the sure foundation of my ministry and my life.

Rev. S.A.Sundararaj(Late)
(Foundation)
A.G. Church, Vellore - 6